Friday Ramblings

It's Friday so you know the deal...

• I GOT MY BEYONCE TICKET!!!!!!  AND I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TO PROMISE MY FIRST BORN CHILD TO SOME RANDOM A$$ STRANGER!!!  YOU MAD?! *flips weave*
• Oh yeah, I love Beyonce but she's better seen and not heard...unless she's singing.  She's a horrible interviewer.  
• I accidentally touched a customer's hand on Monday and the guy says to me, "Oh Brittany you're trying to hold my hand!  Unfortunately I'm unhappily married so..."  I had no clue what to say besides awkwardly laugh.
• Everyone shouldn't be a parent.  I had this lady tell her 7 year old daughter (I believe it was her daughter), "Why you got that coat on?  It's ugly."  Please take note that it was like 30 or 40 degrees outside.  The little girl luckily answered with an intelligent, "Because it's cold."  She should have asked her mom why she had that bad weave in her head.
• I'm addicted to this "Bad" song by Wale.  I'm pretty sure I listened to it at least ten times in one day.
• Soooooooo I took my special education exams today for teaching.  Ya'll I was sitting in that test looking like, O_O.
• Terrance J is now single!  I've been waiting on this day ya'll!  *pushes boobs up*
• Rihanna has a line coming out with MAC!  OMG I love nearly every lipstick color that she wears.  She's just bad all around.  Minus that clothing line that she just displayed at Fashion Week in London I believe.
• I'm glad Alicia Keys did something different with her hair for Wendy Williams' show.  Now the NBA All-Star game is another story.  She's helping keep the JAM! super hold gel line in business though.
• I went to Miyako's Sunday and was eating on the leftover for two additional days.  Let me tell ya'll, I have zero clue what in the hell they cook their food with but EVERYTIME I ate that food I was knocked out for a good two hours.  No lie.  Like horse tranquilizers must be mixed into the seasoning.  
• So mothers are out here getting lap dances for their 13/16 year old son's birthday party nowadays huh?  I guess learning how to properly make it rain is a skilled that must be taught early on.
• Rob Kardashian is packing on the pounds I see.  Kris Jenner must have a weight loss deal in the works for him.
• I know that in the morning my arms and hands are going to be soooooooo sore.  Jesus be some Bengay and a heating pad.  I hit that chair spin, while reversing mid-spin, and hit that backwards hook spin though.
• If my Mom says one more thing about my hair I'm going to go AWF on this woman.  I'm just at a point where I don't care right now.  Maybe I should just chop this sh*t off.  Then she can't say anything...let me stop.  I know she'll find something for the hell of it.
• I went to what I thought was going to be a stretching and flexibility class.  Turns out it was a strengthening and flexibility class.  I was trying to hit freaking crunches in mid-air.  Oh the pain!
• I want THIS dress.  Someone spend money on little ol' me!
• Amber Rose finally gave birth to the child she's been carrying around as long as a baby elephant!  Congrats to her and Wiz Khalifa.

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday so you know the deal...

• Let's do a Grammys recap
• Let us all have a moment of silence for Katy Perry's boobs at The Grammys.  Like they were just...perfect.
• J. Lo you have some badddddddddddddd legs!  Like I have nice legs, but Lord how can I get mine like hers?
• Beyonce you have a nice butt.
• The best decision Kelly Rowland ever made was that boob job.
• Rihanna and Chris Brown made it to the show this time.  Let us hope they can make it back home safely.
• I had to laugh my a$$ off after Frank Ocean beat Chris Brown.
• Rihanna was sounding like she was struggling during that Bob Marley tribute.  They should have got Lauryn Hill.
• Carrie Underwood has one of the prettiest voices.
• I guess Prince just doesn't age.
• I love Frank Ocean, but Frank Ocean performing live is another story.  I thought I was about to die of boredom. 
• Was Alicia Keys trying to channel Sheila E at The Grammys beating on those drums?
• Just watched Keeping Up With the Kardashians.  Kris Jenner has ZERO loyalty to anyone besides Kim I swear.  I bet if Kim told her to marry some random man off the street she'd leave her husband in a heart beat.
• We can add Amber Rose to the list of celebrities that carry babies as long as elephants.  
• Duchess (from Black Ink) you are dumb as hell for going out on a date and sleeping with Ceaser (yes that's how his name is spelled).  If there's one thing I've learned in life, don't mix business with pleasure.  In addition to that the man has a child with a woman who was only a friend with benefits.  WTF?!?!  Plus it seems like she's just in LOVE with the man after one date.
• I would sell my soul to figure out what fountain of youth Halle Berry is drinking from.
• I'm just learning about this new version of the Harlem Shake.  It.  Is.  Hilarious.
• Some pastor in Augusta has upset someone.  They printed fliers off talking about how un-Godly he was and that he was sleeping with a member of his congregation.  Chileeeeeeeee...*neck roll and beats weave*
• I miss Athens.  I miss Sriacha sauce.  I pray they sell it in my local Walmart.  My eggs are naked without it.  I guess these jalapeno peppers will have to do.
• I watched Top Gun.  Tom Cruise you used to be extremely sexy.  
• I saw a woman drinking Coca Cola out of two liter bottle.  I had the most disgusted look on my face ya'll.  
• Thursday Night=SUPER FUN!

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday so you know the deal...

• OH MAH GAWD DID YOU GUYS SEE BEYONCE SLAY THE SUPER BOWL HALF TIME SHOW?!?!  LIKE SERIOUSLY THE POWER WENT OUT!  THE ONLY THING THAT WOULD HAVE TOPPED THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN IF BANE CAME OUT.
• Sorry I typed that in all caps.  I was excited.
• My friend and I are currently on the search for cute men in Augusta.  Well not a search but we're wondering where they're at.  SHOW YO' SELF FOOL!
• I finally tried Zumba out.  That ish is fun as hell.  Who knew I could use my twerking skills towards something positive in life.
• Even though I can't stand the name Mendecees or however the hell you spell it I must admit he is kind of fine.  For those of ya'll who don't know who I'm talking about that's Yandy's man from Love & Hip Hop.
• Also I'm kind of obsessed with this Black Ink show.  I cannot stand looking at Dutchess talk though.  Like something about seeing and hearing her speak annoys the hell out of me.
• Lil' negroes in Augusta tryna fight outside Forever 21.  What ya'll are NOT gonna do is disrespect that store like that.  Take your behinds down to Charlotte Russe a.k.a. A Far Less Classy Place.
• I'm about to sell my kidney on the black market in order to get these Beyonce tickets.  Don't judge me ya'll!
• I'm going through my tattoo phase again.  *sigh*  By next week it'll be over.
• OMG I'm just realizing Joe Budden says, "Baby like it raw.  I don't even use a magnum" on this She Don't Put It Down song.  Nastyyyyy
• Shout out to Michelle Williams for nearly falling on her face when she popped up on stage.  You're lucky you caught yourself b/c Beyonce and Kelly will still replace your behind even if ya'll aren't together anymore.
• I bought sexy undergarments...that only I'll see.
• I accidentally opened a package up that belonged to my Dad.  I am forever damaged by it.
• Being the good daughter I am I agreed to go to a line dancing class with my Mom.  I was the youngest person in there besides the little kid with her happy meal, but I must admit I had fun.  A lot of the dances were things I'd never seen.  Shout out to my elementary school P.E. coach for being the main one to show me how to do the dances.
• On that note, my Mom has no rhythm or coordination.  She didn't take it very well when I told her that though.
• Tyrese has a relationship book coming out despite barely being able to demonstrate his knowledge of the English language while on Twitter.  Thankfully Rev. Run (from Run-DMC) is a co-author of it because I don't want Tyrese's love advice when he thinks women should just accept men cheating.
• I'm slowly becoming a master at pole dancing...well the beginner level.
• Say it ain't so Fitz!!!!!!!  SAY IT AIN'T SO!

It's About To Go Down: Key Lime Cake

 

Saturday night I walked downstairs into my kitchen and said to my Mom, "Betty Crocker's in the building!"  I wish I could find the image of Beyonce walking into her last tour with the sequin outfit when she tousles her hair because that's how my entrance was or like this.  EPIC!  Okay but on a serious note, for the Superbowl I agreed to bake a cake for my Dad's "party."  I decided on key lime cake for two reasons:  1.)  The first time I made it back in 2009 it was an epic failure!  I bought the wrong type of lime jello.  I got excited and tried taking it out of the pan BEFORE it cooled down resulting in it falling apart.  Plus it was overcooked.  God bless my boyfriend at the time for saying it was good as he worked his way around the burned edges.  2.)  The last time I bought some from a restaurant my Mom decided to eat it without consulting with me.  So here we are, baking a cake, and ish.