Friday Ramblings

It's Friday, you know the deal...

• When you start to realize all the stuff you have to pay for if you want a nice wedding and begin questioning if you should just elope...but you've worked too hard on your Pinterest board to give up.  #deTURMANedToWed #GetMarriedOrGoBrokeTrying #BeyonceTasteTeacherPockets
• Everyday I question how people have more than two kids.  Like my parents only have me and my brother and I don't see how they did that now that I reflect on it.  
• Rwanda out here making documentaries about stuff some American men don't care for.  Google Sacred Waters and find out about it.
• Shameless is a pretty good show.  Some stuff seems like it would never happen in real life but nonetheless pretty good show.
• I'm still in need of that personal trainer...and nutritionist.  Primarily the nutritionist since I can't properly eat to save my life.
• People in Augusta out rallying for Trump 2020.  Can we please just get through the first year or two?
• Started my graduate program last week.  Found out I had been dropped from a course minutes before leaving for Statesboro.  I proceeded to freak out.  Luckily I have been added back.
• Speaking of graduate school, I need to start a GoFund me so y'all can help pay some of my tuition.
• When your friend post a line up for One Music Fest and you internally cry because you won't have the time to do anything outside of work for the next x-amount of years.
• They canceled Underground right after I got into it.  I know somebody better pick it up if they're willing to have all these Tyler Perry shows on cable.  *Looks at Oprah Winfrey*
• Why are these men mud wrestling on The Bachelorette?  This ain't sexy.
• Is HBO gonna fire Bill Maher or let him go?  I don't care how "liberal" he is (dude seems to be very much against Muslims if you ask me).  He was never invited to the cookout...regardless of the fact that he dated Karrine Steffans.
• Halle Berry out here either lying or trying to keep herself relevant with this alleged food baby.  Take your 50 year old self somewhere with this mess.
• Men are out here making music video proposals and I'm just trying to get mine to pick out groomsmen.  I feel like I deserve an invite to their wedding also.
• There are moments when I look at people with their kids and think, "Man I can't wait to have my own kids" and then within a split second that changes as the child does something that makes me turn my face up.
• I need to get married just for the vision insurance at this point.  Like my job has the worst vision insurance.   It doesn't even help pay for glasses. Actually it's just medical insurance that lets you get a comprehensive eye exam every two years, but that's not the point.
• When you're in love with TLC's new song but the only option iTunes provides you with has Snoop Dogg on it.
• It's that time of year when I want to cut my hair off, but don't know what my curl pattern is. 
• When your graduate school readings make you glad not to be a teacher in the late 19th and early 20th century.
• Kendrick Lamar gets his little sister a Toyota Camry and y'all out here yelling that he should have got the girl a BMW.  She's 18.  Y'all need to be concerned with what her post-graduate plans are. #PrioritiesAllMixedUp #HesRichNotHer
• When your cousin tells his mom that you need to send him some philosophical books and you're trying to figure out what in the heck that means.  The Autobiography of Malcolm X and Native Son it is then.
• Derek Fisher out here flipping cars over that belong to other men.  Now Matt Barnes gotta go beat him up again.
• Will Kyrie Irving be having his All White yacht party again this year?  #AskingForAFriend #QTNA
• When you see a dress on a stick figure model that you like but question if you would have too much showing in the front.  Should I risk paying $72 or nah?

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday, you know the deal...

• Who let Mariah Carey make a fool of herself on the last day of 2016?!
• My Dad swore up and down that I didn't have to go to work on Monday, the day of New Year's Day.  If only that were the case...
• When your Dad asks how much a wedding costs and you read the national average and he just about falls out of his seat.  #ImYourOnlyDaughter #ImTheBaby #ImYourSecondFavoriteChild
• I'm leaving wack car salesmen in 2016.  Don't try selling me a car with a recall on it.
• I'm trying to get that Teyana Taylor body for 2017...after I eat this 8-count nugget from Chick-fil-a.
• I need to put on a bridal expo.  I know these people making money from folks like me buying tickets.
• Thank you to whoever created the humidifier.  I love you and you will get into heaven for this blessing.
• Friday Night Tykes has taught me one thing:  Texas does NOT play about football.  $16k on football equipment for 8 year olds?!  
• Some of these news outlets kind of shady with the announcement of Janet's baby.  "Janet gives birth to first son."  Soooooooo...we still on that story that Janet had a little girl way back when?  We can't just say, "Janet gives birth to first child"?
• Lord let my certificate upgrade hurry up and clear so I can get this pay raise that I've worked towards for the last year and a half.
• 2017 Fitness Goals:  Michelle Obama arms, Beyonce abs, and a Serena Williams booty...maybe a Michelle Obama booty because Serena has a LOT of junk in the trunk.
• I nearly cried watching the video of Cam Newton reading his letter to his son.  
• When your fiance gets you the PERFECT birthday card and writes the PERFECT message inside of it.  
• 
  

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday, so you know the deal...

• I graduated last week!!!!!  #PutSomeRespecktOnMyName #2Degrees #PayRaise
• Why is being an adult so expensive?  Like why do I have to pay almost $80 to keep my place warm and functioning?  My parents should be obligated to take care of me because I did NOT ask to be brought into this cold, cold world.
• The Walking Dead better pick up or I'm gonna stop watching.
•  Kudos to Trevor Noah for this interview!  I know in an alternative right universe others are saying Tomi Lahren told Trevor off.
• Anyone who gets a gift from me is lucky.  My checking account wasn't ready for this holiday. #MakeMyBankAccountGreatAgain
• When a kid in another grade informs you that they heard you are mean...
• Christmas Break is here too!!!! #NoKidsForTwoWeeks #Relaxation
• None of my kids have talked about Elf On the Shelf.  I am slightly disappointed by this.  
• Really like this Pear Nova polish I got.  Didn't even have to put a top coat on it for it to shine.  Which is good because I just about had to sell an arm and leg to afford it.
• I'm not sure how true Narcos is but Pablo Escobar was not the dude to play with.  
• Yasssssss Shea Moisture for this lipstick and yasssss Target for having it on clearance.
• It's the holiday season which means it's engagement season.  Let me keep my nails painted...just in case.
• I could have gone without watching this Hairspray Live show.  It didn't impress me but then again none of these live shows do.
• I'm gonna start being petty with some of my family when it comes to invites.  There is a purpose behind RSVP'ing my people.  #NoMoreInvitesForYou
• Chris Rock is going on tour.  Time to spend a million dollars on tickets.
• It's about time Rick and them get some courage.  On that note, I'm glad Spencer's dead.  Ol' punk behind tried to be slick and get power over something he has no clue about.
• I just want to find a fringe dress.  Why is this so hard?!  I found one!
• I saw one of my old students working.  They were so calm and polite.  I asked myself, "Why was this child so evil when I taught them?"
• Finally went and played golf.  It was only nine holes but it was fun.  I've gotta do that more often.
• Straight hair is only fun for about three days.  After that I become tired of it and want someone to braid it up.
• When your little cousin says she's gonna get multiple gifts for her boyfriend, but you try telling her not to do it.
• Emory University is about to offer a course on Black self-love.  I love it!
• When you go to your parents house excited to watch that good cable but Xfinity is acting up.  Why Lord?  Why?!
• When your friends say you're picky but you're in denial.
• I want to go to Topgolf.  Maybe I should have set that up for my birthday.
• Why'd I agree to go to the outlets with my Mom and brother?  I have no money to spend.  Should have went with my Daddy and indirectly asked him to buy stuff for me.

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday...you know the deal

• Berry Fanta is straight TRASH!!!!  All y'all folks who've been raving over this TRASH owe me $2 back. #TasteLikeCoughMedicine
• My acne is coming back with a vengeance.  What have I ever done to deserve this?!  
• I feel like Stanley from The Office by Thursday.  #ImJustReadyToGo #ButTheWeekendGoesBySoQuick
• DMX had his 15th kid.  Dude...has nobody taught him about contraceptives.  Like, you have to get tired of getting women pregnant after like the 5th or 6th kid in my mind.  His baby mamas probably get peanuts when it comes to child support because dude has no music coming out and stays in jail.  He should have stayed away from Brenda, Latisha, Linda, Felisha, Dawn, LaShawn, Inez, Delisha, and the 20 other women named in that song,   #WhatTheyReallyWant 
• Why y'all mad with Tyler Perry over casting a show mainly with white people?  Y'all do realize his movies and screenwriting isn't good?
• This woman on Good Morning America called Black folks "colored."  Lord Jesus...let me check what year it is.
• edTPA can suck it.  Talking about I'll only get a $100 refund when I paid $300.  Rip off!
• Walter White is a prime example of why teachers should be paid more.  Man has to sell illegal things to pay for his chemo. 
• I just want to graduate.  Lord Jesus, please let me get through this last semester. 
• All of y'all talking about how pro-black Luke Cage is and all I can think of is how he was having some serious relations with Jessica Jones.  #WhenHeGetOnHeGoneLeaveYourBehindForAWhiteGirl
• I'm ready to take a whole bunch of pictures with my hair out and have captions from Solange's new album. #ASeatAtTheTable
• Yes to this 60 day Sam's Club membership card.  I'm buying tons of fruit.
• Fall Break Where Art Thou?!
• The look on my face when Zaxby's told me they don't sell bottled water anymore.  Lord...is this a sign for me to stop eating there?  Please tell me dear sweet baby Jesus.
• How much water do I have to drink before my skin clears up?  How many processed food orders do I have to give up as well?
• I'm gonna have to jump ship to the Dallas Cowboys with the Panthers losing.  I'll be all for the Cowboys as long as Dak Prescott is playing.
• When you've got a jam packed weekend and your beautician is gonna be out of town it seems.  Time to block out six hours of my life to wash and twist this stuff.
• I've been looking for thigh high boots since 2010.  I've yet to find them.  The Devil is trying to keep me down.
• Tiffany Evans a.k.a. Yes I'll Rock Your Promise Ring is out here looking like a young Keyshia Cole, but with better pitch.
• Why did Kim Kardashian have $10 million worth of jewelry with her?  See...that's why you need broke friends.  They'll tell you how to properly travel.
• I need to start finding my New Year's outfit.    
• Who is Nate Parker's PR person?  They seriously need to work with him on these rape allegation questions.  Whether or not he was acquitted or found not guilty, dude cannot be out here saying he does not feel any guilt/remorse over it.  Making himself look like a butt hole.
• From now on when people ask me stuff that I know come from other folks I'm gonna hit them with that Shirleen, "Askth thine own question straight from thine own mouth.  Because I will pop the messenger."
• Note to self, don't take your boyfriend to dinner with your family.  All folks are gonna do is call him your husband, claim them self as his mother-in-law, and ask when you gonna get a ring on your finger.  #SoundLikeAQuestionStraightFromYaGrandmaMouth #ImRunninAnEmpire #YourCreditScoreOn200 #BeAboutYoMoney
• Is it December 16th yet?  No?  Let me get back in my cocoon.  
• Empire....what I saw:
• I caught Empire...does Lil' Romeo have braids?  Like...if that was him I seriously got flashbacks to when I was 11/12 and he had braids.
• Why is Mariah Carey half naked on here?!  Why is she ALWAYS half naked?
• Anxiety medicine does not work that quick Jamal or was that something else?
• They managed to get Taye Diggs on this show?  Wow...it still surprises me how "anti-Black woman" they've always claimed him to be, but that's his fan base.
•   #ChocolateDrop #HowStellaGotHerGrooveBack
• How does your graduate program page have no admission deadlines listed, but the overall admission page tells me to visit the program page to find the deadline?  Like how?
• How my week has been, "Me:  Write everything on this page."  "Them:  Everything?"  "Me: Everything." "Them: Even the numbers?"  "Me: *blank stare* Ummmm....EV-ER-Y-THING.  That means numbers, words, arrows...anything that is on the page."  "Them:  Huh?"  *Me: *Slamming my head against the wall in my mind*"
• Parents don't realize how much they hurt their kids doing their work for them.  I mean, my Mom did a lot of my projects but now I really see the downfall of that.
• Death to rubrics.  I hate making them.  Like I HATE making these things.
• When is Lil' Wayne retiring?  Like...I'm pretty sure it's time for him to retire.
• This weekend seems like a good time to use this massage gift card.  Watch I don't use it though.
• Hurricane about to hit the coast yet the area I work in won't be getting rain until about 2 P.M.  Why does it NEVER rain during the 15 minute period of recess?!

Candied Pecans

I wanted to make a strawberry pecan salad with homemade raspberry vinaigrette and really wanted some candied pecans on it.  Walmart didn't have anything specifically labeled as "candied pecans" instead they had honey pecans or something like that for $4.  I looked up a recipe and knew I had all of the ingredients at home.  Therefore, being my awesome self I decided to make my own candied pecans, but altered the recipe some.

Ingredients
1-1/2 cup of pecan halves
1/2 cup white sugar
1 egg white
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 tablespoon water
1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
Pinch of salt

Preparation
1.)  Preheat your oven to 250 degrees Fahrenheit and cover a baking sheet in aluminum foil.

2.)  I recommend mixing your white sugar, cinnamon, and salt in a small bowl (like what you eat cereal out of).

3.)  Whisk your egg white, water, and vanilla in a large bowl until it is frothy.

4.)  Pour your pecans in the bowl with your egg white mix and stir with a spatula to ensure each pecan gets the mix.

5.)  Pour the sugar mix into the bowl of pecans.  Stir well with a spatula to evenly distribute your sugar mix.
6.)  With your hand remove the pecans and evenly spread onto baking sheet.
7.)  Cook for 1 hour and stir the pecans every 15 minutes with a clean spatula.

8.)  Remove from oven and let cool off for 15 minutes.  Enjoy!

Reflection
These were really good, but I think next time I may try to do 1/4 cup white sugar and 1/4 cup brown sugar.  I also may try to use vanilla extract in place of water.

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday, you know the deal...

• People were up in arms over Kyrie Irving having a yacht party full of white women.  When I looked at the story my first thought was, "Kyrie Irving?  Who is that?"  I had to look him up to discover he's the dude who pretty much got media attention after his girlfriend allegedly cheated on him and let it be known through instagram.  With that said, Kyrie Irving is a nobody in my book still.
• I signed up for a cake decorating class and I realized how I don't eat baked goods like that.  I ate one piece of the cake I decorated and didn't eat another piece.  It was good cake though
• 30 for 30 has me wanting to find a "Bad Boys of Detroit" t-shirt.
• I swear to y'all nothing makes me happier than seeing Black kids who LOVE reading.  Like it seriously touches my soul.  #BlackKidMagic
• Found 144 Expo markers on sale for $75 and then the price went down to $55.  The Lord is good! *hits teacher praise dance* #DryEraseMarkersAreWorthGold
• Finally got around to ordering Warsan Shire's Teaching My Mother How To Give Birth and then discovered soft magic by Upile Chisala.  I swear I should have kept writing because I used to be a young Maya Angelou in my past. #ImBiasedThough 
• Speaking of poetry, I still wish my city had a strong creative community.  I always wanted to attend a poetry slam, but I've never been able to find one.  I also wanted to be in the Vagina Monologues (missed my chance in college because I graduated right before I mustered up the courage) or For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide/When The Rainbow Is Enuf.
• Why have I been listening to Jodeci none stop since Saturday?!  I realize more and more how the 90's had some great music.
• Also, the men of Jodeci look pretty bad.  This Devante Swing guy was cute back in the day...but drugs will mess you up.
• My skin has just been breaking out all summer in the forehead and chin area.  I swear every summer it's a new area of my face.  Ugh...too old for this mess.  Why me?!
• Summer is almost over.  Didn't cut my hair off.  Didn't get my hoop nose ring...that I've been wanting for almost 10 years.  Decided I wanted a tattoo...know I'm not going to get it.
• Finally got some living room furniture and it's too much for my little place.  I had to get my Mom a.k.a. Suge Knight to make them take 2/3 of it back.
• I swear I spend all my money when the school year approaches.  I had almost $200 in my cart on Amazon, but decided it was best to split my order up.  I know I've probably spent $100 at Target already on stuff for my room.  I need my pay raise NOW!
• Well...Taylor Swift is officially back on my {Bleep} List after Kim Kardashian exposed her lies.  No more sympathy for you Taylor. #HeMadeThatGirlFamous
• When is the annual Racial Draft?  We need to get rid of Omarosa if we haven't done so already.  Director of African-American Outreach?  More like the overseer slave. #ByeFelicia
• Melanie Trump's ghostwriter is out here making her look foolish!  They just decided to copy and paste from Michelle Obama's 2008 speech thinking nobody would notice.  Dude, this is 2016!  The internet is FULL of people waiting on the next set of memes they plaster across the web.  #WeDontCare #MakeAmericaGreatAgain #OneCopyAndPasteAtATime
• "You may write me down in history with your bitter, twisted lies.  You may trod me in the very dirt but still, like dust, I'll rise."  #FamousMelanieTrumpQuotes
• Ted Cruz is out here sticking it to the man y'all!  Dude did what he wanted by not endorsing Trump.
• Everybody needs to throw $50 my way so I can get supplies for my classroom. #BrokePhiBroke #BallinOnABudget
• This child told me she's ready to go to 1st grade so she can have her own desk and get some privacy.  In that moment I thought teaching kids that young may not be that bad...but I think that grade cries a bit much for my liking.
• How did I manage to go to Target and spend $37 on THREE items?!  THREE items!
• I'm going to try this oil cleansing method that Hey Fran Hey talks about.  Here's to hoping my sensitive skin doesn't go crazy.

How To Be A Housewife: Eggplant Pizza

It's the summer and I usually try some new foods.  This summer I've been slacking though and haven't really done as much.  After realizing that I gained ten pounds from March 2015 to October 2015 I have somewhat realized that I need to make some lifestyle changes.  My goal for the rest of the year is to try to eat healthier and I'm trying to make that change this week.  So yesterday I went to Kroger and purchased an eggplant for $0.98.  I've never had eggplant before today and I was pleasantly surprised at how good it was.

Ingredients
Eggplant
Marinara Sauce
Salt
Pepper
Provolone or Mozzarella slices (whichever type of cheese you like)
Oregano
Spinach (optional)
Olive Oil