The Things We Do For Love: My Curlformers Experience

If you all don't know I order Curlformers last Sunday and received them on Thursday if I remember correctly.  After seeing all the results and looking for something new I decided I would make the $32.75 purchase for 36 long and narrow Curlformers from ebay.  When I received them in the mail I noticed that the seller sent me two packs of 36, but with these things coming from Puerto Rico and this being their mistake that benefited me I said there was no way I would send them back.  Good thing that she sent me that extra set actually.  Anyways the main reason I finally decided to get these things was because one Sunday during my hair day I asked my boyfriend how I should do my hair.  The only options are twists or twist outs because I am style challenged.  He said he wanted curls which honestly pissed me off because I took it as him being tired of my style.  He denied it but I'm pretty sure I was right.  Regardless I figured I'd be nice and do something he requested.

I pre-pooed my hair with Herbal Essence Hello Hydration Conditioner, shampooed with Suave Clarifying Shampoo, conditioned with that same Herbal Essence conditioner, and deep conditioned with Aussie 3 Minute Miracle I put my hair into big twist to help hold some of the water in plus I knew it would make things easier for me as this is a process that requires clean hair parts.  Oh yeah, my leave-in conditioner of choice was Kinky Curly Knot Today followed by a Jamaican Black Castor Oil and Coconut mix to seal the moisture in.

All 72 Curlformers that I received.

Freshly washed, detangled, and separated hair.  This was around 8:30 P.M..  I had intentions to start way earlier but after going to church with my Mom and having to help her "cook" (I only made banana pudding.)  I could actually reach the sink until like 5.

This was around 3:00 A.M.  

Don't let the smile fool you.  I was pissed off and tired by this time.  I honestly would have quit at 10 o'clock had my boyfriend not begged me to finish them.

Obviously I'm in my junky room.

Let me tell you all this.  I had 72 of these things and only used 69 just in case ya'll were wondering about these twists.  On one of them my hair got CAUGHT on the hook and as I tried to push it back out the hook went THROUGH the Curlformer.  Yeah once that occurs you're in for a hard ride trying to get it out.  Although it had occurred before I was seriously to a point where I said, "Eff this.  I want to go to bed."

RESULTS!!!!

Just Let Your Soul Glow

So for some reason I just thought about all the odd and what I considered embarrassing moments that I've had with my hair...it's only two I can recall honestly.  No, I've never had a track of weave come out nor was I that little girl in elementary school with those crochet braids that you would find on the pavement walking to P.E. in a line.  My incidents have always involved having to much oily substance in my head.

(1)  The Dentist Chair
When I had braces from 7th grade to 9th grade my appointments to get my braces tightened up were always on Monday which also meant that my Mom did my hair the day before.  Yes, my Mom did my hair until I went to high school don't judge me.  You know how the dentist chairs have those paper covers on the area that you lay your head?  Yes, every Monday after the dentist changed my bands I would get up, look back at the chair, and see that piece of paper saturated with Blue Magic.  It was almost like the napkins your mom uses to soak up some of the grease from fried fish, chicken, or french fries.  You know what I'm talking about.  Finally my Mom and I came to the conclusion that we, or she more so, had to just put less hair grease on my scalp.  Regardless I can only think of my poor white MCG student orthodontist seeing that thing and pulling it off for his next patient.

(2)  Dillard's at The Mall of Georgia
I believe coconut oil got really popular in the natural hair community around 2010 because I remember coming home for Spring Break that year and my Mom had a jar of it.  The first time I tried it I used a reasonable amount and saw how soft it made my hair.  So I figured if I put a ton of it in my hair will be like crazy soft.  Yeahhhhh I was wrong.  I had asked my Mom to braid my hair in four big braids so I could have a nice wavy look and she complained about how much oil I put in, but I figured it'll soak up so whatever.  Nope!  The next day we went to The Mall of Georgia and there's something about formal dresses that just makes me always want to look at them.  We saw a really pretty pink dress and I had to try it on.  I tried it on and realized I didn't like how it looked on me so of course I took it off having to pull it over my head.  As my Mom hung it up we saw tons of oil stains similar to the ones I discussed at the dentist.  The next question was, "How in the hell do we get out of here without someone noticing that we effed this $200 dress up?"  Easy, when the dressing room attendant ask if there's anything you want her to hang up for you say no and put it back on the rack with the other dresses...all the way in the back.

I Like A Long Haired, Thick Red Bone: My First Braiding Experience

 Today I went through the long and semi-painful process of getting my hair professionally braided for the first time.  I went to a new shop in Augusta called Hair Garden owned by Melissa, a beautician I met via Twitter. I had asked her last year about getting braids and never contacted her after that first tweet.  This year I said I would do it and I did.  So I bought 5 packs of kanekalon hair, some money, and my A Belle In Brooklyn by Demetria Lucas (Essence Magazine relationship editor) to make the process happen.  Melissa washed my hair and in true beautician fashion put me to shame when it came to how easy she detangled it.  After blow drying and separating my hair into four parts she and her assistant Cassie (we were friends in high school so I was shocked and glad to see her after four years) went to work.  From 11:39 A.M. to 5:09 P.M. I had two beauticians braiding my hair...at the same damn time.  Whenever Melissa began twisting my edges I thought I was going to break her chair from how hard I was pressing against the foot rest on it.  Honestly, when I felt her parting a small section of hair on my edges I felt like a child who knew they were about to get the worst whipping from their parent ever, no Creflo Dollar.  Yes, that is how I felt.  Anyways after what I believe was 6.5-7 packs (the other 1.5-2 packs were courtesy of Melissa) of type 2 kanekalon, a few hair rods, and 5.5 hours my hair was completed.  My first reaction before seeing it was, "OMG this is heavy!"  I felt like I had a whole new person on my head as odd as that sounds.  I concluded that this is how white tourist feel when they get their hair braided in the Bahamas as young girls call out to them, "You want your hair braided lady?"  

I've never had THIS much hair on my head so it will take some time getting use to it.

I have horrible posture! 

When Melissa told me her assistant was a white girl she said, "Don't worry, she can braid some hair."  She told the truth and the most interesting thing is her assistant and I went to high school together.  If I had known she could braid back then I would have been asking her to braid my hair all the time.

She recommended that when it came to the upkeep to massage some shampoo (I'll dilute it with water) onto my scalp, but not vigorously rub it.  I should be able to wash it once a week she told me.  She said I need to put a light oil on it, coconut oil for me, every other night as my scalp is exposed a lot more than usual.  I'd like to keep these in at least six weeks and look up some wash to style them when I'm not at work.  If you are in the Augusta, GA or CSRA area you can find Melissa's shop at 138 8th Street downtown.  Her Facebook page can be found here.

My Attempt: Whipped Shea Butter

So if I haven't mentioned it on here I have ridiculously dry hair.  People always talk about how shea butter is a great sealant and putting it on the ends of their hair to keep things nice and sealed in...I guess.  So until I start work (If I still have a summer job) I decided to try a little Do It Yourself (DIY) type thing and Googled "whipped shea butter."  Why?  Well shea butter in its raw state is just hard to get out and I wanted something easier.  So after looking at videos I got up this morning and headed to the hair store.  I bought a 16oz container of unrefined African Shea Butter for $7.99.

I started off by boiling a small pot of water to melt the shea butter.

This is the amount of shea butter I used.  I only used a small amount because I didn't want this to be a disaster and I end up wasting a ton of good product.

I Am Not My Hair...The Biggest Bullsh*t I Have Heard

Six years ago India.Arie released a song that took over the mindsets of so many women even to this day.  That song was "I Am Not My Hair."  I will admit that when that song came out I was one of the main people running around singing it with my chemically damaged hair, but when I look back on it that song is the biggest bullsh*t I have ever heard.  What Black woman can honestly say they are not "their hair?"  No, not Black woman but woman in general?  I'm pretty sure there is some girl out there saying, "I got natural hair so I know that I am not my hair!"  Please stop honey.  As I sit here scratching my scalp that needs to be badly moisturized and retwisted I know that this is all a lie.

From the time we are young girls hair is a HUGE deal to young girls in the Black community.  You either have "good hair" or if you don't you spend your whole life trying to achieve some form of it.  This can include getting relaxers, texturizers, sew-ins, etc.  When it comes to hair we will spend every waking moment trying to make it the best it can be.  When Chris Rock's "Good Hair" came out and revealed all the horrible things that come along with the creamy crack a group of Black women vowed never to deal with the long hours of sitting in the beauty shop only to suffer chemical burns so their new growth would go unnoticed.  When some of these women realized the difficulty that came along with the two textures a group of them said, "Let's cut this sh*t awf!"  The rest is history.

We're All Self-Conscious I'm Just The First To Admit It

My dear friend Sir Vantes made a blog today about how he's been seeing a ton of the people that he follows on Tumblr talking about how they don't like certain things about themselves, and as I read it truly SPOKE to me ya'll.  For a minute I thought, "Damn is this blog about me?"  Then I came back to reality.  We all have our little insecurities and I decided to write a little bit about mine.
Hair
Since I was a child I have had the biggest issue with this crazy mane of mine!  When I was younger with a head full of nappy hair (as my mother called it) I wanted to have long blonde hair that I could swing around like all the girls who went to private school with me.  I'd pray every night to wake up with that hair, but when my Mom woke me up it was right back to me flinching as she put my hair into my classic pigtails that I wore until 7th grade!  Between that time I did get relaxers and go natural multiple times.  When I got into high school I had to do my own hair and I always wore ponytails with my damaged hair relaxed hair.  I wanted that ish to swing and hang like all friends after they got a wrap...never happened until 12th grade when I went to a different beautician after my hair broke off from my Cotillion weave.  Now I'm back on the natural tip and wondering why this ish won't grow for me!  Some people LOVE my hair when I'm rocking a twist out, but they don't know the ish I have to go through for it.  Every other week I'm ready to chop it off and I chicken out.  My hair grows, but due to having dry hair and not properly moisturizing it I always have to get it cut.  Plus I hate when I'm separating it and I can literally just pull at my ends and hair just comes out.  

Skin
Here's something that I haven't always had issues with, but it has always caused some issue with me.  I had a horrible case of chicken pox back when I was a yungin'.  I think I got them when I was two or three.  Well according to my family I had them all over my body with blisters on the bottom of my feet.  When my Grandpa was alive he would tell me about my Mom laying in bed with me just spreading something on my body as I lay helpless.  I do have memories of her putting tons of cocoa butter on me every morning and night for the scars I had left over.  Like seriously my legs were covered in dark brown marks.  I do have a few scars left over from them like one on my leg and some little marks on my stomach and hand.  I later on had hives, but it wasn't as tragic as my chicken pox story.  Now I'm still dealing with acne which is ridiculous because I'm 22.  I feel like this is such a teenager problem and I've had it since the 7th grade!  I didn't wear tank tops from 7th-11th grade because I didn't want anybody to see my arms and back.  I kind of grew to accept it which is when it calmed down, but I always feel jealous when I see people with skin that looks like they're a Nivea skin care model.

Torso
Ya'll I need to get in the gym and do some crunches like a mo'fo.  I have a horrible diet and don't exercise.  Everyone thinks I'm Skinny Minnie when they look at me, but I can grab a big handful of belly fat.  Every year I tell myself I'm going to do something, but nothing changes.  I want to wear cut off shirts so bad and I could if I just didn't care, but due to my ability to know what looks  a hot mess I stop myself from buying those shirts.  I just wish other girls thought like me.

Butt
Plain and simple, I want a booty like Nicki.  I don't if it's real or fake.  I just want it!  My Mom's family all has these Serena William booties that you can put a whole meal on almost and my Dad's family has pancake booties.  I got a combo of the two.  It's wide but it just doesn't want to pop out.  One day though!