Friday, December 23, 2016

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday, so you know the deal...

  • I graduated last week!!!!!  #PutSomeRespecktOnMyName #2Degrees #PayRaise
  • Why is being an adult so expensive?  Like why do I have to pay almost $80 to keep my place warm and functioning?  My parents should be obligated to take care of me because I did NOT ask to be brought into this cold, cold world.
  • The Walking Dead better pick up or I'm gonna stop watching.
  •  Kudos to Trevor Noah for this interview!  I know in an alternative right universe others are saying Tomi Lahren told Trevor off.
  • Anyone who gets a gift from me is lucky.  My checking account wasn't ready for this holiday. #MakeMyBankAccountGreatAgain
  • When a kid in another grade informs you that they heard you are mean...
  • Christmas Break is here too!!!! #NoKidsForTwoWeeks #Relaxation
  • None of my kids have talked about Elf On the Shelf.  I am slightly disappointed by this.  
  • Really like this Pear Nova polish I got.  Didn't even have to put a top coat on it for it to shine.  Which is good because I just about had to sell an arm and leg to afford it.
  • I'm not sure how true Narcos is but Pablo Escobar was not the dude to play with.  
  • Yasssssss Shea Moisture for this lipstick and yasssss Target for having it on clearance.
  • It's the holiday season which means it's engagement season.  Let me keep my nails painted...just in case.
  • I could have gone without watching this Hairspray Live show.  It didn't impress me but then again none of these live shows do.
  • I'm gonna start being petty with some of my family when it comes to invites.  There is a purpose behind RSVP'ing my people.  #NoMoreInvitesForYou
  • Chris Rock is going on tour.  Time to spend a million dollars on tickets.
  • It's about time Rick and them get some courage.  On that note, I'm glad Spencer's dead.  Ol' punk behind tried to be slick and get power over something he has no clue about.
  • I just want to find a fringe dress.  Why is this so hard?!  I found one!
  • I saw one of my old students working.  They were so calm and polite.  I asked myself, "Why was this child so evil when I taught them?"
  • Finally went and played golf.  It was only nine holes but it was fun.  I've gotta do that more often.
  • Straight hair is only fun for about three days.  After that I become tired of it and want someone to braid it up.
  • When your little cousin says she's gonna get multiple gifts for her boyfriend, but you try telling her not to do it.
  • Emory University is about to offer a course on Black self-love.  I love it!
  • When you go to your parents house excited to watch that good cable but Xfinity is acting up.  Why Lord?  Why?!
  • When your friends say you're picky but you're in denial.
  • I want to go to Topgolf.  Maybe I should have set that up for my birthday.
  • Why'd I agree to go to the outlets with my Mom and brother?  I have no money to spend.  Should have went with my Daddy and indirectly asked him to buy stuff for me.

Friday, October 7, 2016

Friday Ramblings

It's know the deal
  • Berry Fanta is straight TRASH!!!!  All y'all folks who've been raving over this TRASH owe me $2 back. #TasteLikeCoughMedicine
  • My acne is coming back with a vengeance.  What have I ever done to deserve this?!  
  • I feel like Stanley from The Office by Thursday.  #ImJustReadyToGo #ButTheWeekendGoesBySoQuick
  • DMX had his 15th kid.  Dude...has nobody taught him about contraceptives.  Like, you have to get tired of getting women pregnant after like the 5th or 6th kid in my mind.  His baby mamas probably get peanuts when it comes to child support because dude has no music coming out and stays in jail.  He should have stayed away from Brenda, Latisha, Linda, Felisha, Dawn, LaShawn, Inez, Delisha, and the 20 other women named in that song,   #WhatTheyReallyWant 
  • Why y'all mad with Tyler Perry over casting a show mainly with white people?  Y'all do realize his movies and screenwriting isn't good?
  • This woman on Good Morning America called Black folks "colored."  Lord Jesus...let me check what year it is.
  • edTPA can suck it.  Talking about I'll only get a $100 refund when I paid $300.  Rip off!
  • Walter White is a prime example of why teachers should be paid more.  Man has to sell illegal things to pay for his chemo. 
  • I just want to graduate.  Lord Jesus, please let me get through this last semester. 
  • All of y'all talking about how pro-black Luke Cage is and all I can think of is how he was having some serious relations with Jessica Jones.  #WhenHeGetOnHeGoneLeaveYourBehindForAWhiteGirl
  • I'm ready to take a whole bunch of pictures with my hair out and have captions from Solange's new album. #ASeatAtTheTable
  • Yes to this 60 day Sam's Club membership card.  I'm buying tons of fruit.
  • Fall Break Where Art Thou?!
  • The look on my face when Zaxby's told me they don't sell bottled water anymore. this a sign for me to stop eating there?  Please tell me dear sweet baby Jesus.
  • How much water do I have to drink before my skin clears up?  How many processed food orders do I have to give up as well?
  • I'm gonna have to jump ship to the Dallas Cowboys with the Panthers losing.  I'll be all for the Cowboys as long as Dak Prescott is playing.
  • When you've got a jam packed weekend and your beautician is gonna be out of town it seems.  Time to block out six hours of my life to wash and twist this stuff.
  • I've been looking for thigh high boots since 2010.  I've yet to find them.  The Devil is trying to keep me down.
  • Tiffany Evans a.k.a. Yes I'll Rock Your Promise Ring is out here looking like a young Keyshia Cole, but with better pitch.
  • Why did Kim Kardashian have $10 million worth of jewelry with her?  See...that's why you need broke friends.  They'll tell you how to properly travel.
  • I need to start finding my New Year's outfit.    
  • Who is Nate Parker's PR person?  They seriously need to work with him on these rape allegation questions.  Whether or not he was acquitted or found not guilty, dude cannot be out here saying he does not feel any guilt/remorse over it.  Making himself look like a butt hole.
  • From now on when people ask me stuff that I know come from other folks I'm gonna hit them with that Shirleen, "Askth thine own question straight from thine own mouth.  Because I will pop the messenger."
  • Note to self, don't take your boyfriend to dinner with your family.  All folks are gonna do is call him your husband, claim them self as his mother-in-law, and ask when you gonna get a ring on your finger.  #SoundLikeAQuestionStraightFromYaGrandmaMouth #ImRunninAnEmpire #YourCreditScoreOn200 #BeAboutYoMoney
  • Is it December 16th yet?  No?  Let me get back in my cocoon.  
  • Empire....what I saw:
    • I caught Empire...does Lil' Romeo have braids?  Like...if that was him I seriously got flashbacks to when I was 11/12 and he had braids.
    • Why is Mariah Carey half naked on here?!  Why is she ALWAYS half naked?
    • Anxiety medicine does not work that quick Jamal or was that something else?
    • They managed to get Taye Diggs on this show? still surprises me how "anti-Black woman" they've always claimed him to be, but that's his fan base.
  •   #ChocolateDrop #HowStellaGotHerGrooveBack
  • How does your graduate program page have no admission deadlines listed, but the overall admission page tells me to visit the program page to find the deadline?  Like how?
  • How my week has been, "Me:  Write everything on this page."  "Them:  Everything?"  "Me: Everything." "Them: Even the numbers?"  "Me: *blank stare* Ummmm....EV-ER-Y-THING.  That means numbers, words, arrows...anything that is on the page."  "Them:  Huh?"  *Me: *Slamming my head against the wall in my mind*"
  • Parents don't realize how much they hurt their kids doing their work for them.  I mean, my Mom did a lot of my projects but now I really see the downfall of that.
  • Death to rubrics.  I hate making them.  Like I HATE making these things.
  • When is Lil' Wayne retiring?  Like...I'm pretty sure it's time for him to retire.
  • This weekend seems like a good time to use this massage gift card.  Watch I don't use it though.
  • Hurricane about to hit the coast yet the area I work in won't be getting rain until about 2 P.M.  Why does it NEVER rain during the 15 minute period of recess?!

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Candied Pecans

I wanted to make a strawberry pecan salad with homemade raspberry vinaigrette and really wanted some candied pecans on it.  Walmart didn't have anything specifically labeled as "candied pecans" instead they had honey pecans or something like that for $4.  I looked up a recipe and knew I had all of the ingredients at home.  Therefore, being my awesome self I decided to make my own candied pecans, but altered the recipe some.

1-1/2 cup of pecan halves
1/2 cup white sugar
1 egg white
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 tablespoon water
1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
Pinch of salt

1.)  Preheat your oven to 250 degrees Fahrenheit and cover a baking sheet in aluminum foil.

2.)  I recommend mixing your white sugar, cinnamon, and salt in a small bowl (like what you eat cereal out of).

3.)  Whisk your egg white, water, and vanilla in a large bowl until it is frothy.

4.)  Pour your pecans in the bowl with your egg white mix and stir with a spatula to ensure each pecan gets the mix.

5.)  Pour the sugar mix into the bowl of pecans.  Stir well with a spatula to evenly distribute your sugar mix.
6.)  With your hand remove the pecans and evenly spread onto baking sheet.
7.)  Cook for 1 hour and stir the pecans every 15 minutes with a clean spatula.

8.)  Remove from oven and let cool off for 15 minutes.  Enjoy!

These were really good, but I think next time I may try to do 1/4 cup white sugar and 1/4 cup brown sugar.  I also may try to use vanilla extract in place of water.

Friday, July 22, 2016

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday, you know the deal...

  • People were up in arms over Kyrie Irving having a yacht party full of white women.  When I looked at the story my first thought was, "Kyrie Irving?  Who is that?"  I had to look him up to discover he's the dude who pretty much got media attention after his girlfriend allegedly cheated on him and let it be known through instagram.  With that said, Kyrie Irving is a nobody in my book still.
  • I signed up for a cake decorating class and I realized how I don't eat baked goods like that.  I ate one piece of the cake I decorated and didn't eat another piece.  It was good cake though
  • 30 for 30 has me wanting to find a "Bad Boys of Detroit" t-shirt.
  • I swear to y'all nothing makes me happier than seeing Black kids who LOVE reading.  Like it seriously touches my soul.  #BlackKidMagic
  • Found 144 Expo markers on sale for $75 and then the price went down to $55.  The Lord is good! *hits teacher praise dance* #DryEraseMarkersAreWorthGold
  • Finally got around to ordering Warsan Shire's Teaching My Mother How To Give Birth and then discovered soft magic by Upile Chisala.  I swear I should have kept writing because I used to be a young Maya Angelou in my past. #ImBiasedThough 
  • Speaking of poetry, I still wish my city had a strong creative community.  I always wanted to attend a poetry slam, but I've never been able to find one.  I also wanted to be in the Vagina Monologues (missed my chance in college because I graduated right before I mustered up the courage) or For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide/When The Rainbow Is Enuf.
  • Why have I been listening to Jodeci none stop since Saturday?!  I realize more and more how the 90's had some great music.
  • Also, the men of Jodeci look pretty bad.  This Devante Swing guy was cute back in the day...but drugs will mess you up.
  • My skin has just been breaking out all summer in the forehead and chin area.  I swear every summer it's a new area of my face.  Ugh...too old for this mess.  Why me?!
  • Summer is almost over.  Didn't cut my hair off.  Didn't get my hoop nose ring...that I've been wanting for almost 10 years.  Decided I wanted a tattoo...know I'm not going to get it.
  • Finally got some living room furniture and it's too much for my little place.  I had to get my Mom a.k.a. Suge Knight to make them take 2/3 of it back.
  • I swear I spend all my money when the school year approaches.  I had almost $200 in my cart on Amazon, but decided it was best to split my order up.  I know I've probably spent $100 at Target already on stuff for my room.  I need my pay raise NOW!
  • Well...Taylor Swift is officially back on my {Bleep} List after Kim Kardashian exposed her lies.  No more sympathy for you Taylor. #HeMadeThatGirlFamous
  • When is the annual Racial Draft?  We need to get rid of Omarosa if we haven't done so already.  Director of African-American Outreach?  More like the overseer slave. #ByeFelicia
  • Melanie Trump's ghostwriter is out here making her look foolish!  They just decided to copy and paste from Michelle Obama's 2008 speech thinking nobody would notice.  Dude, this is 2016!  The internet is FULL of people waiting on the next set of memes they plaster across the web.  #WeDontCare #MakeAmericaGreatAgain #OneCopyAndPasteAtATime
  • "You may write me down in history with your bitter, twisted lies.  You may trod me in the very dirt but still, like dust, I'll rise."  #FamousMelanieTrumpQuotes
  • Ted Cruz is out here sticking it to the man y'all!  Dude did what he wanted by not endorsing Trump.
  • Everybody needs to throw $50 my way so I can get supplies for my classroom. #BrokePhiBroke #BallinOnABudget
  • This child told me she's ready to go to 1st grade so she can have her own desk and get some privacy.  In that moment I thought teaching kids that young may not be that bad...but I think that grade cries a bit much for my liking.
  • How did I manage to go to Target and spend $37 on THREE items?!  THREE items!
  • I'm going to try this oil cleansing method that Hey Fran Hey talks about.  Here's to hoping my sensitive skin doesn't go crazy.

Wednesday, July 6, 2016

How To Be A Housewife: Eggplant Pizza

It's the summer and I usually try some new foods.  This summer I've been slacking though and haven't really done as much.  After realizing that I gained ten pounds from March 2015 to October 2015 I have somewhat realized that I need to make some lifestyle changes.  My goal for the rest of the year is to try to eat healthier and I'm trying to make that change this week.  So yesterday I went to Kroger and purchased an eggplant for $0.98.  I've never had eggplant before today and I was pleasantly surprised at how good it was.

Marinara Sauce
Provolone or Mozzarella slices (whichever type of cheese you like)
Spinach (optional)
Olive Oil

Friday, June 24, 2016

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday, so you know the deal...

  •'s been awhile since I typed that out.
  • I had the "privilege" of being hit on last week while in my car with my friend.  Despite telling the guy that I had a boyfriend he informed me he would happily be my "side n****" because it's 2017.  I should have been kind enough to inform him that it's 2016, but I don't think he would have cared. #NobodyHitsOnMe #BlameMyRestingWitchFace #ImCute #IGuess
  • I thought about cutting my hair, but once again I'm a punk.  Like seriously, I am the biggest punk.
  • Netflix is the Devil.  I've watch the full House of Cards series (Season 4 didn't impress me too much) and I'm nearly finished with Mad Men (Today is Monday and I'll probably be finished by the time this is posted.)  I'm pretty sure this isn't healthy.  
  • Speaking of Mad Men, Don Draper is bae.  Well he would be bae but I'm pretty sure he had to have contracted some type of STD because all he does is sleep with A LOT of women.  
  • My friend called my FitBit an old people's watch in a subtle way.  I tried to kick her out of Logan's, but she didn't leave.  I just cut my eyes at her the rest of the time. Taylor this is about you.
  • Taking a cake decorating class.  I'm ready to turn in my letter of resignation and sell cakes out of my house.  I mean, who cares if I only know how to do a rosette swirl.  Right?  Baby Cakes coming soon!
  • Pretty sure I have ADD but nobody has diagnosed me.
  • I need a serious vacation.  As in me at the beach in swimsuit covered in a t-shirt so nobody can see my chubby body.
  • American Crime Story has made me obsessed with O.J. Simpson.  Anything that comes on about him I have to watch.  
  • My Mom turned 35 despite having a child whose 37 and another whose 26.  I've gotta ask her what's her secret. #SheKnowsAboutTheFountainOfYouth
  • My step-grandmother believes men should be allowed to cheat.  I should have informed her that nobody cares about her opinion.
  • Have y'all seen the videos of the guy who cooks a bunch of stuff with Hennessy?  Everytime I watch them I want to vomit  and then I question why he's wasting his money and good food.
  • I still can't believe Donald Trump is actually a presidential nominee.  Like, Republicans you all should be ashamed of yourselves.  This is the equivalent of letting your bad child get out of hand and to the point that you can't control them anymore.  Republicans, this is your fault.  Be ashamed of yourself.
  • OJ's friend AC is a wimp.  He let OJ TAKE his girlfriend, was ready to take a bullet for him, and then was his getaway driver.  I guess some people would say he's a good friend, but I just call him stupid.
  • Since I don't have cable I've been watching a ton of 30 for 30 films.  Some of these stories are absolutely sad.  Case in point, Without Bias, which is about Len Bias who died two days after being drafted by the Celtics from a cocaine overdose.
  • This alligator case is so out of hand.  They're shutting all these beaches down because of it.  I'll hold some of my feelings to myself.
  • How in the heck did the Warriors lose the series?!  Like...I'm not even a basketball fan but the feelings I felt when I discovered the Cavs won game 7.  #LightSkinBrotherComebackHasComeToAClose #StephCurryWithoutTheShotBoy
  • Y'all men turned on Ayesha Curry quick, fast, and in a hurry when she said the NBA was rigged.  What happened to y'all wanting an Ayesha in your life?  #SheCanCook #SheCanClean #JustDontSpeakYourMind
  • Some of y'all need to teach your kids manners.  I had a kid jump over me at the movies and the grandma didn't tell him to say "excuse me" or anything.  Just rude...I wanted to yank his behind back so bad, but I'm not made for jail.
  • Finding Dory was somewhat sad at some parts.  I found myself nearly shedding a tear, but quickly wiped my eyes. #NoTearsOnMyCheeks #ThugLife #StillNotMadeForJail
  • OMG Kanye said his wife is the female OJ in this Schoolboy Q song.  This is so amusing to me. My love for Kanye might return.
  • Speaking of Kanye...Kim Kardashian should have kept her "soul" food plate picture on her phone.  I saw that picture and laughed for a good minute.
  • This woman in my decorating class does what she wants.  Instructor tells us to make buttercream icing.  She makes cream cheese icing.  Instructor says bake a cake so we can tort and level it in class.  She brings the half of the cake that she already torted so she has no true top layer.  Why are you in the class if you're just going to do what you want?!
  • Why y'all sending Britney Griner "Happy Father's Day" tweets?  I swear I hate y'all because you have no chill.  Like zero chill any given day.  
  • I managed to watch the first episode of Oprah's show Greenleaf thank God for my parents having cable.  It was pretty good.  Not sure how it can be a tv series instead of a miniseries, but if Oprah can keep a story going then it should be fine.
  • Speaking of that show, Lynn Whitfield always has to play some evil woman.  ALWAYS!  Her face is super snatched though.  Like that thing just got a lift a month before the series started to film.
  • It's so hot in Georgia y'all.  Like my thighs are sweating every moment it feels like.  This could be a sign that I need to lose weight though.
  • Mom's out here getting arrested for whipping their kids after catching them in the wrong.  I told my Mom about this and how she should be in jail for all the whippings I received.  Her only response was, "I probably didn't whip you enough." #SheDontCare #SecondChildGetsNoLove

Friday, May 6, 2016

Sip The Lemonade: Beyonce's Formation Tour

On Sunday, May 1st I received all my life at the Beyonce Formation Tour.  My beau bought the tickets for me as a Valentine's gift and the anticipation to May 1st began.

Let me start off with this...I had the pleasure of seeing some FABULOUS outfits at this concert along with even better jewelry.  I'm so serious when I say men have some of the best neck pieces.  I found myself wanting to snatch some necklaces off, but remembered I'm not made for jail.  Along with the good also came the bad.  There were definitely people there with outfits not for their body type.  I'm all for self-love of one's body, but please make sure you don't buy things too small for yourself.  No reason as to why you should be pulling your one piece out of your butt after every step you make.  Along with steps, some people failed to realize they were not Beyonce as they came strutting to the Georgia Dome in their six inch heels.  Before and after I saw women's heels leaning to the side as women took each step.  Their heels were asking the Good Lord not to let this be their final day in the shoe world I'm pretty sure.

I was curious as to why DJ Khaled was the opening act five minute prior to to his performance, but soon I was reminded of the benefits of the Hip Hop Kirk Franklin opening.  Rick Ross came out first no ankle monitor visible to the eye.  2 Chainz emerged next (I was hoping he was Future), T.I. was allowed to take the day off of daddy duty, Ludacris a la pick in small fro, The-Dream, and whoever the man is that sings the song about a Spanish woman talking to him and him replying in Japanese #SheSaidHolaComoEsta #KeepForeignLanguageInSchools.  DJ Khaled then proceeded to hit his best Obama impersonation with a drop of the mic.  #KhaledOut #WeDaBest

I then proceed to wait for what seemed like an eternity in Bey Hive time.  She offered us two Ivy Park ads, but I'm not sure about buying any of that because House of Dereon was not the best quality.  After about a hour the lights went out, I heard the swarming of bees, and all that was left was the illuminating light of the mysterious white cube.  The stage proceeded to be filled with smoke and that cube.  The only thing going through my mind was was where she was gonna come from.  I'm pretty sure I started hyperventilating about it.  Right then the beat to Formation dropped and emerged Beyonce in her American Horror Story:  Coven glory.  Y'all can't tell me Beyonce isn't the new Supreme!  Me and the thousands of other people hollered out "I SLAY!" numerous times at her demand.

The hat disappeared and the hair shaking began.  This woman must not get headaches because my head would be in pain as must as she shakes that weave.  She did her classic Run The World minus all the dropping it down low.  She performed some of the my favorites from Lemonade like Hold Up, Don't Hurt Yourself (her guitarist or bass player did an amazing solo prior to this song being played), All Night Long, and Sorry (plenty of middle fingers up telling boys bye).  I anticipated the line of "Better call Becky with the good hair" and searched the crowd to see what some Beckys would do.  I wasn't disappointed as a blonde girl probably in her 20's proceeded to twist her hair and then flip it.  The anger of a 1,000 Bernadettes from Waiting To Exhale filled me in that moment.

She at some point gave us this speech on loving yourself even when you've been hurt prior to performing Me, Myself, and I.  All these emotions filled me as I closed my eyes and sang along because I definitely blasted some music from her during my break-ups (ummm...Why Don't You Love circa 2010 the day after my first boyfriend broke up with).  When she performed Sorry I became more fascinated with the back-up dancer with the short hair blonde hair, Saidah Naiobi.  Seriously she made me want to go chop my hair off and dye it platinum blonde.  I think I found myself looking for her in every dance after that.  Oh yeah, did anybody else get Huey Newton vibes when Beyonce had that chair come out as she sang Ring The Alarm?

At some point the romance and odes to love/baby making began to play as she belted out my favorite from her Beyonce album Rocket with a little Untitled by D'Angelo, 1+1, Blow, Naughty Girl with Nasty Girl mixed in by Vanity 6, and Drunk In Love (the screen even gave the effect of being intoxicated).  I finally had the chance to witness her do that chair flip in Partition but missed it by a millisecond trying to tell my beau something.  I was ticked off to say the least.  This is also the part of the show when I started to realize that Beyonce's butt isn't as big as the media makes it.  From the back it's curvy, but from the side its not that plump looking.  She's just got a tight butt that sits up high I think.

The dancer I'm talking about is on the right.  Serving all types of #Goddess.

In her final set she emerged in true superhero form with a cape blowing in the man made wind and no shoes.  

Super Beyonce to the rescue!!!

The stage was filled with water and the dancers began the ritual Rain Dance to Freedom as Beyonce's showed she was was smart and purchased bundles of Wet & Wavy for the special occasion.  I wonder how many women with fresh weaves were upset about getting splashed with a little water or if they took it all in because the water had been blessed by Beyonce's knees and feet.  She performed Halo but that is one song I've never cared about 

Overall the show was fabulous and a great to start to my week seeing how it's Teacher Appreciation Week and three weeks of school left.  There are not many singers out here who can sing with 100% effort and dance at the same time like Beyonce.  I look forward to seeing her again in the near future hopefully.  

All photos with came from either Beyonce's Facebook or PopSugar because (1) I wasn't that close and (2) my iPhone doesn't produce such high quality photos.