Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Just Let Your Soul Glow

So for some reason I just thought about all the odd and what I considered embarrassing moments that I've had with my hair...it's only two I can recall honestly.  No, I've never had a track of weave come out nor was I that little girl in elementary school with those crochet braids that you would find on the pavement walking to P.E. in a line.  My incidents have always involved having to much oily substance in my head.

(1)  The Dentist Chair
When I had braces from 7th grade to 9th grade my appointments to get my braces tightened up were always on Monday which also meant that my Mom did my hair the day before.  Yes, my Mom did my hair until I went to high school don't judge me.  You know how the dentist chairs have those paper covers on the area that you lay your head?  Yes, every Monday after the dentist changed my bands I would get up, look back at the chair, and see that piece of paper saturated with Blue Magic.  It was almost like the napkins your mom uses to soak up some of the grease from fried fish, chicken, or french fries.  You know what I'm talking about.  Finally my Mom and I came to the conclusion that we, or she more so, had to just put less hair grease on my scalp.  Regardless I can only think of my poor white MCG student orthodontist seeing that thing and pulling it off for his next patient.

(2)  Dillard's at The Mall of Georgia
I believe coconut oil got really popular in the natural hair community around 2010 because I remember coming home for Spring Break that year and my Mom had a jar of it.  The first time I tried it I used a reasonable amount and saw how soft it made my hair.  So I figured if I put a ton of it in my hair will be like crazy soft.  Yeahhhhh I was wrong.  I had asked my Mom to braid my hair in four big braids so I could have a nice wavy look and she complained about how much oil I put in, but I figured it'll soak up so whatever.  Nope!  The next day we went to The Mall of Georgia and there's something about formal dresses that just makes me always want to look at them.  We saw a really pretty pink dress and I had to try it on.  I tried it on and realized I didn't like how it looked on me so of course I took it off having to pull it over my head.  As my Mom hung it up we saw tons of oil stains similar to the ones I discussed at the dentist.  The next question was, "How in the hell do we get out of here without someone noticing that we effed this $200 dress up?"  Easy, when the dressing room attendant ask if there's anything you want her to hang up for you say no and put it back on the rack with the other dresses...all the way in the back.

Monday, July 30, 2012

This Is It: Chick-fil-A

I have wrote two other blogs on this whole Chick-fil-A thing, made comments on other blogs, and have discussed it with others.  The other two blogs probably won't be published because I have realized that if you don't fully agree with boycotting Chick-fil-A you are wrong for your beliefs.  I am not here for controversy so this is all I will say.  I will eat at Chick-fil-A, not because I believe in "traditional marriage" as I am all for same sex marriage, but because I believe everyone has the right to believe in whatever the hell they want to.  I've realized that I do not feel strong enough about boycotting the place because I am not gay and although I do have gay friends I believe there are plenty of other companies who would need to be boycotted because of who they donated money to.  Yes, if Chick-fil-A was donating money to the KKK I probably wouldn't be eating there, but since the KKK has been known for its hate towards African Americans I believe I have stronger emotional ties to them.  This is probably why I cannot sit and fully relate to the issue 100% that it makes me want to go to these extremes.  As long as Dan Cathy has not come out saying he hates gays and wishes they would all die in hell, his stance on the issue has not pulled that much on my heartstrings to the point that I will never return to the one at the mall, Augusta Exchange, Beechwood in Athens, or Alps store.  To everyone who says that this just means I'm not a true supporter of gay rights I question what you all say to those who are actually apart of the LGBT community and still want to eat there.

Dan Cathy is a Christian and as a Christian he is supposed to stand up for his beliefs just like those of the LGBT community are doing.  I have realized that when it comes to topics that are hot in the media if you do not fully side with the group who is considered the victim you are a bad person which is unfortunate.  Everyone wants Mr. Cathy to have an open mind about what marriage could be, but nobody understands that this man is 59 years old and since he has been a child I'm sure those are what his beliefs have been.  It is also his job as Christian to love his neighbor regardless of what they may be.  If he is funding groups that are "anti-gay" then it means he needs to take a seat and reexamine how strong his beliefs are.  At the same time he is not telling his employees to treat anybody differently because of their sexuality.  Straight, gay, Black, or white you are still greeted with "Welcome to Chick-fil-A" or "It'll be my pleasure."  This is what he believes in morally.

 If we are so strong on everyone having their civil rights guaranteed to them we would be boycotting a lot of companies.  Will we ignore the companies who hire illegal immigrants or have sweatshops that under pay these people simply because it's just the little old illegal immigrants or because we feel that these countries need jobs so bad that something is better than nothing even if it means paying $1.25/hour to people working 12 hour shifts?  If you don't want to eat there don't go because I guarantee you that these boycotts are not going to make Dan Cathy stop believing in what he wants to.

Friday, July 27, 2012

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday so you know the deal...

  • I guess people like standing me up because my Mom was supposed to attend a movie with me tonight.  I called her before I got off from work and she's talking about, "Oh we can go see it tomorrow."  I was too damn pissed especially because when she got home she says, "So you want to go see the movie tonight?"  No woman!  
  • I need some of ya'll to stop acting like b*tches when you come to the movies.  Yes, I know about the Colorado shooting but it gives you no right to come up to me and ask if you'll:  A.) Get shot watching the movie.  That won't happen unless you brought your own damn gun and somehow shoot yourself.  B.)  Ask if you can bring your personal firearm into the movies.  That's how sh*t like that got started.  One person shooting up the movies does not mean that it's going to happen if you go.  Besides if God says its your time to go then you've got to move.
  • Screw Lil' Scrappy and his You-Got-Me-On-The-Child-Support-a$$.  Then the fact that he said he takes care of his child yet when she asked what happened to the money she asked for he says, "I forgot."  GTFOH!
  • I finally got my Jamaican Black Castor Oil!  This stuff is super duper thick!  My hair better be thick I know that...well thicker because it already is thick.
  • I had a dad ask for three tickets to see Magic Mike.  His oldest daughter tricked him into buying the tickets.  He and the youngest had no clue what was going on.
  • Anyone want to buy me some Curlformers?  I'd love you forever and ever!
  • I finally cooked for my boyfriend.  We had some delicious steaks with a broccoli and cauliflower mix. The best thing was he baked his first cake.  You all have no idea how excited I was for that cake and it was nice and soft.  Please tell me this is love.
  • I got a brand new laptop!  I paid for it all with the money that I saved up over the summer.  I've never felt so good.  It's such an amazing sense of independence.  
  • Seagram's Escapes are just a little piece of heaven.  I didn't realize these things were considered beers, but these are probably the only beers I'll ever like.
  • I have three new babies in the form of birds on my porch.  
  • I WANT A PUPPY!!!!!!
I kill pride.  I hurt feelings.

Thursday, July 26, 2012

That's The Way Love Goes

So I was in Forever 21 one day looking for a nice dress and came across this necklace for $10.80.  I debated on getting it because I wanted some earring, but figured "When would I find a necklace like this again?"  It reminded me of the one Janet Jackson wore in her video That's The Way Love Goes.  Her necklace looked more "Native American" than mine I guess after looking at the video.  Oh well...I've yet to wear it yet.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

My Attempts: Strawberry Lemonade

Strawberries have to be one of my favorite fruits in the world besides watermelon.  So today as I returned from the mall  and realized that my Mom had gone to the grocery store I decided I wanted to make some strawberry lemonade.  So I did.

Monday, July 23, 2012

Bucket List

We all have a list of things we'd like to do before we die and I'd like to share mine:

  • Learn how to decorate cakes.
  • Do voice over work for a Pixar film.
  • Write a movie length screenplay and sell it.
  • Go hiking...crazy for me.
  • Own a dog seeing how I never had one of my own.
  • Live in Brooklyn for a summer.  
  • Buy myself something from Tiffany's.
  • Do a pin-up photo shoot. 
  • Travel to France, Italy, England, and Spain for one vacation.
  • Attend a Beyonce concert.
  • Attend a Prince concert.
  • Work in a bridal boutique. 
  • Do some type of volunteer work in a developing country.
  • Cut my hair off into a nice fade.
  • Earn my Doctorate.
Old photo of me from my freshman year of college.

Friday, July 20, 2012

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday so you know the deal...

  • I just want to start this off by saying everyone should see The Dark Knight Rises.  My job allowed the floor staff to watch it Thursday morning at 7am and my butt was up bright and early to see it.  It was AWESOME on so many levels.  Like seriously...I want to be Catwoman for Halloween because of it.  The color of red lipstick that Anne Hathaway wears in the film is absolutely beautiful.  Oh and the previews are awesome too.  Who knew there was a new Wizard of Oz movie coming out?
  • So I watched an episode of Family Guy yesterday in which Bonnie, Joe's wife, wasn't pregnant.  I was like, "WTF?"  
  • I'm on the search for a puppy ya'll, but it has to be one that remains little forever.  I do have a fear of dogs, but the small ones not so much.
  • Speaking of animals we have a bird living in one of our plants!  I even found out that it's laid three little eggs.  I swear I feel like I'm waiting on a family member to have a kid or something.  Like I seriously cannot wait until they hatch.  
  • Why are people trying to create a petition for Ciara to stop making music?  I don't care for her anymore, but dang let her TRY to be great ya'll.
  • Love & Hip Hop-Stebbie J a.k.a. Stevie J and Scrappy disgust me as men.
  • It's payday b*tches!!!!
  • I saw a cute black dress with white polka dots in Target.  I can already see myself wearing it with a red lipstick.
No funny photo because I found this one far too cool.

Friday, July 13, 2012

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday so you know the deal...

  • It's Friday the 13th! *cue Nicki Minaj line*
  • So I recently discovered that my laptop's wifi has STOPPED working.  If that ain't a b*tch I don't know what is.
  • Speaking of laptops my Mom just said I should get a "less expensive one" next time.  I told her mine was about $500 which is average I believe, especially back in 2008.  She hollered that I only said that because I didn't pay for it.  This woman acts like I had a freaking Macbook Pro or something.
  • Everyone go see Katy Perry's Part of Me.  I loved it and found my eyes watering when her marriage was coming to an end. Plus you see how much she loves her fans.
  • My head is killing me right now for some reason!  #JesusBeATylenol 
  • My boyfriend bought be flowers Wednesday for our date night.  It was such a surprise and I couldn't help but find myself smiling no matter how hard I tried not to.  Plus we went to Carraba's and I found myself having the best plate of calamari that I've had in awhile.  Like I love that stuff.
  • I've decided that I want to be a peacock for Halloween this year.  Let's see how it goes.
  • I had a few blogs that I wanted to do this week, but need my pictures to do so and with my wifi not working and my Mom's computer not letting me connect via ethernet cord it was a no go.
  • Ya girl worked 46 hours this week.  Overtime like a mug.  $$$$
  • I just read that the dude who plays Omar on Single Ladies isn't gay.  Say what?!?!?!?!  His body is amazing by the way.  He's on the new cover of Kontrol Magazine if you want to see.
  • I want some mozzarella sticks!  Ever since my job started selling them the craving as hit harder than ever!  
  • I hate the smell of cooking grease with a passion so much now just so ya'll now.
  • I have realized that I have a love/hate relationship with Kim Kardashian.  I love how she looks and what she wears, but as a celeb no ma'am.
  • Love & Hip Hop Atlanta...yeahhhhh...just yeah.  Erica, Mimi, and Jose a.k.a. Joseline all look like some fools.

Monday, July 9, 2012

Dance Like A Stripper: My First Experience Pole Dancing

How I was moving by the end of the class...in my mind.

You know how you have a few select things that you'd like to do before you die?  Well mine was taking a pole dancing class and I can finally mark it off my bucket list.  Being in boring Augusta I try to find exciting things to do so while searching the internet for "pole dancing Augusta" I came across 5, 6, 7, 8 Studios.  I found a coworker who was just as awkward and willing to try new things with me.  Next thing we knew we were standing in the back of the class looking at each other like, "What the f*ck did we get ourselves into?"  We started the class out stretches to sexy music like Christina Milan's "Dip It Low" and started learning a few spins on the pole.  I'm not sure if I've ever told you all this, but I'm probably one of the most uncoordinated people in the world and I'm not sure if it has to do with me being left-handed (they say we do everything backwards).

The first spin we learned was the Princess Spin.  It involved us walking around the pole really sexy, wrapping our inner foot around it, pushing off with our outer foot, and bringing it under our other foot.  After many attempts I only got half way around the pole.  Another girl who was at our pole seemed to have a lot of experience despite this being an intro class.  Everytime she approached the pole for her turn I just thought to myself, "This hoe is trying to show me and Maria up.  Hell naw."  I swear she looked like an amateur stripper with all the grace she had, but we learned she had taken classes for a month up in New York.  I still hate her.  I think halfway through the class I was finally moving with some form of grace, this must have been around the time we learned how to do circles with our legs.  I pretty much had to hold onto the pole and kick my legs out into circles.  The funniest thing was when the instructor told me to just "spread my legs out more."  I seriously busted out laughing.  Yes, I'm immature and have no shame in admitting it.  I was happy that Maria didn't end up with a concussion after nearly falling as we learned some move that resulted in us kicking our legs out and dipping back.  We closed the class out with a "pop quiz" of the different things we learned.  When it was my turn I selected Beyonce's "Dance For You" and showed out...in my mind.

The next day I woke up with extremely sore arms and thighs followed by the next day which resulted in EVERYTHING hurting.  Despite this I really can't wait to go again.  It's probably the most fun I've ever had and it'll help build my upper body strength.  The class really made me think about how insecure women are with being sexy or at least myself.  Our instructor encouraged us to look into the mirror as we danced but I often found myself looking everyone other way as I giggled at what I was doing.  I believe this is something that is highly discussed in the Black community, at least when it comes to the act of masturbation and sex.  When I came home I just told my Mom that I went to a dance class out of fear of her going back to tell my Dad who probably would have spazzed out.  My cousin actually takes classes in Atlanta and every picture or video she post just inspires me.  She's actually the reason why I wanted to try the class out.  Whenever I tell people she does this they always ask, "Your cousin's a stripper?!?!?!"  Which results in me saying no and telling them that she is very educated.  I hope to return back a few times before the summer ends as classes are $13 without the having a monthly package.  I've even looked up pole dancing in Athens.  I'm that serious.  Here's to hoping this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Friday, July 6, 2012

Friday Ramblings

It's Friday so you know the deal...

  • My router isn't working so working on my laptop at home is out of the question.  Because of that I've been on my Mom's computer which is slow due to her constant adding of whatever she comes across on the internet.  For example, the cursor mania and smiley central in the toolbar that I haven't seen since I was 12 years old.  I'm about to start going to fast food places and using their free wifi.
  • I was working like crazy this past week.  30 hours from Friday to Sunday at my job.  My check is about to be too fat in the words of my significant other.
  • Speaking of work, it almost went down Saturday night when a white guy told two of my Black female customers they were holding up the line.  I stood in amusement after taking a step back just in case fist started flying.  
  • Can somebody please tell BET's Stephen Hill to contact me so we can work out something for the BET Awards?  I'm tired of watching this bullsh*t from the channel that's supposed to have the best interest for Black entertainment.  I will make next year's show like the Black Oscars I swear to you.
  • Essence magazine recently talked about the pitfalls of social networks on relationships.  The thing that stuck out the most to me was how seeing engagement announcements on Facebook made women feel pressured to get the ring as soon as possible.  I wonder if this has been the reason behind me joking with my boyfriend about when he's going to propose.  I'm starting to wonder if I'm joking or being serious.
  • Did Jose a.k.a. Joseline call her vagina her "cootie cat?"  I thought it was "kitty cat."  Back to ESOL you go.
  • S/O to Frank Ocean for coming out.  Most artist wouldn't take that risk when they were just starting to gain popularity.  Like seriously, "Think About You" just started playing in my city and I remember hearing it last year on Tumblr.
  • Did Kim Kardashian look out of place at the BET's Awards to anyone else?  I see she and Kanye went for the matching prom look by both wearing white.  Oh well, a closed mouth don't get feed.
  • Did Mama D from Love & Hip Hop Atlanta say she approves of her son cheating on his girlfriend/mother of his child if he wasn't getting what he "needed" at him.  If Maria EVER said that I'd have tell her off then break-up with Javier.  In that order.
  • Did ya'll spot Flex Alexander in Monday's episode of Single Ladies?  From having your own show to Verizion commercials to being in the same scene with the Oscar worthy greats LisaRaye and Lauren London.  Honey you are moving up in this industry.  
  • I need to cook a meal for my boyfriend.  He's starting to aggravate me with questions of when this is taking place.
"Shorty right there ain't his b*tch."

Thursday, July 5, 2012

This Goes Out To All My Baby Mamas: Nia Long & Black Community Outrage

Sorry for my "hiatus" of some sorts.  The router that allows me the freedom to be on my laptop in my room has stopped working on me and the modem for the internet won't let my laptop just hook an ethernet cord to it so I've been on my Mom's slow/out of date computer.  This computer won't let me do anything I swear.  I generally attempt to write two blogs at least a week because of working and such, but my patience is short.  Hopefully I'll figure things out or I'll be making a trip to the local library with my laptop to write.

Earlier this week I was reading a blog that discussed the recent Essence magazine cover for the month of August that featured actress Nia Long and her two beautiful sons.  The title of the blog was pretty much asking the question of whether or not Essence was "glorifying" single motherhood by having Nia on the cover with her boys (one cover includes both of her children and the other includes the baby).  I kind of brushed it all off until our magazine came in the mail today.  My first thought on seeing it was, "They are all so beautiful."  My last concern was the fact that Ms. Long is 41 and yet to be married with two children under her belt.  Then as I drove to my boyfriend's house a local radio deejay was discussing, or mentioning, the cover and people's feelings on it.  I rolled my eyes because to my knowledge she is a single mother and I kind of got the feeling that she wanted to agree with others on the issue except it would be like the pot calling the kettle black.  After much thought I came home and wrote a Facebook status on the entire thing.

1.) I believe the Black community has the highest rate of children being raised in a single parent household with the mother. So if anything Essence is just reflecting the trend in the Black community. 

I am not about to sit here and tell you all this sob story of how my mother raised me by herself with no help from my Dad because that is nowhere near true.  For the past 22 years of my life I have had the pleasure (somewhat) of living with both my parents.  Despite my Dad being a truck driver he has always been involved in my life even though I did not see him everyday.  I have one aunt and one uncle (recently remarried) who were divorced while I grew up, but they were involved in their kids' lives.  I honestly thought everyone was raised by both of their parents until I came to high school.  Yes, I was that sheltered from the world.  I soon discovered that some of my friends had little to no contact with their fathers and my heart hurt honestly.  

Here's the thing, the Black community has the highest rate of children being raised in households were the father is absent or either the mother and father have not been married.  Because of that every Father's Day we often see people putting a status up about their mother being both mama and daddy.  My favorite status was always from one of my friends who recently rekindled her relationship with her father that said, "I ain't have no daddy around when I was growing up."  I'm not saying that being a single mother is a bad thing that Essence was wrong for "glorifying" with this cover, but it honestly reflects the trend that is going on in our community at the current moment.  Therefore it's not "glorifying" it just showing the truth.  It's time that we realize the dream of everyone having a family like the Huxtables that performs musical numbers for special occasions is not reality.  Even if someone comes from a family that isn't "traditional" it doesn't mean the father is not involved in the child's life.  One of my friend's was raised by her mother, but is very close with her father.  This leads me to my next point.